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The Ugly Brothers do a Pig (Whole)

 The Sacrificial Swine
 THE SWINE had probably never heard of the Ugly Brothers before making their acquaintance but, within hours, after having made the ultimate sacrifice, his spirit surely looked back on this world and realized the significance of his short life.

The cause for this celebration was the anniversary of Big Uglys 10th year of marriage with the Pineapple Princess. Planning was started months in advance to ensure that Mr. Pig would be delivered to the luau guests at the very moment he reached his full potential.

Below is a description of how Big & Les Ugly prepared the sacrifice.

 The pig awaits his big moment. He didn't seem nervous at all.  

 THE RACK AND PIT built for this ceremony were simple. Big Ugly took three foot lengths of plain iron pipe which he wire brushed on a grinder then blow torched to ensure a clean iron surface to hold Mr. Pig. Big then built a frame work using two 8 foot 2x4's and four 3 foot 3/4 x 2's. Holes were drilled in the 2 x 4's to slide the rods into.

Once the pit site was selected, iron fence posts were placed in the ground to hold the rack. They would hold the rack three feet above the embers. An old aluminum play pool frame was placed around the area containing the charcoal to help reflect heat back towards Mr. Pig and aluminum foil was wrapped around the parts of the wooden hog frame to prevent it from scorching. A drip pan was centered under the swine to collect the precious juices of Mr. Pig.

 Les humps Mr. Swine
    Les Ugly struggles single handed to wrest the pig onto the alter. Where is Big Ugly when you really need him?

ROASTING MR. PIG required nearly 100 pounds of charcoal in our Ugly Open Pit Barbeque. Under the close supervision of Les & Big Ugly the rack was lifted and turned at intervals determined by Les. After nearly five hours when the thickest parts of Mr. Pig had reached an internal temperature of 170 degrees Fahrenheit. he was carried on the rack to the Serving Alter where his bands were cut free. Approaching slowly Big Ugly and the Pineapple Princess both shared the first taste and with a whoop declared "the Pig is Pork", truly worthy of the sacrifice and invited all guests to share the blessing with them.


The deed is done.
The pig is pork. The gods are giddy over the offering made.

.The Pig is Pork


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